It’s amazing how much impact someone can have on your life without ever meeting them face to face. Although I never met Cheslie Kryst in person, we chatted often on Instagram, and I felt like we were BFFs. I always appreciate when celebrities take time to engage with their social media friends and fans and Cheslie always did.

Most people knew her from her pageant experiences leading up to and after earning the 2019 crown at Miss USA and her role as an EXTRA TV Correspondent. I first discovered Cheslie  through her fashion blog, White Collar Glam. I admired her style and beauty and started following along in 2018.  

Our relationship started to really feel authentic during the early stages of the COVID-19 pandemic when she shared the secret to her abs and launched her 600 ab challenge, inviting Instagram followers to join for accountability.

Originally, I thought ‘There’s no way I can complete 600 ab exercises, but I’m going to give it a shot.” In the first try, I did it and continued to push myself for three months until I went on a trip to Puerto Rico. Cheslie was my personal cheerleader every step of the way. She challenged me and pushed me beyond what I thought was possible. She even shared her title as the ultimate “Queen!”

Every day I look in the mirror and think of Cheslie as I admire the slightest definition in my abs and think “Cheslie would be proud.”

Sunday evening after a leading a scheduled Rooted meeting with ladies from my church and picking up a grocery order, I sat in my car and opened Instagram for the first time that day to the news of Cheslie’s death in New York.

Sobbing in shock and disbelief, I began to look for confirmation and then pray for her family and those feeling the pain of her loss. Through the tears I reflected on her impact and what I learned from her in the short time that I’d been connected to her through digital and social media.

1.     Dream big and work to see your dreams become reality.

By 30 Cheslie had achieved dreams of following in her mom’s footsteps as a pageant queen earning the Miss USA 2019 title and role. In addition she was a licensed attorney who passed the Bar Exam in North Carolina and South Carolina. This is just a short sample of her achievements.

“No matter where you are the possibilities for your future are limited only by the depth of your own imagination.”

-       Chelsie Kryst

2.     Enjoy life… and dessert.

Although Cheslie was very fit, she often enjoyed good hearty meals and loved sweets like banana pudding.

“If there isn’t dessert, I’m not coming.”

-       Cheslie Kryst

3.     Use your skills, experience and voice to drive change.

Beyond her professional responsibilities as a Miss Universe organization representative during her Miss USA reign and an attorney and TV correspondent, Cheslie always incorporated causes that were important to her, including mentorship criminal justice reform and personal and professional etiquette, into her work. She was an ambassador for these causes through her blog and several partnerships with organizations like Dress for Success and Big Brothers Big Sisters.

“Change for the better can sometimes just be a helping hand.”

- Cheslie Kryst

4.     Express yourself boldly.

With big hair and a bigger personality, Cheslie always stepped out with a fierce strut and a radiant smile. She felt most confident in a power suit and often chose ensembles with feminine features including ruffles, buttons and bright colors.

Not only did she express herself creatively through style and fashion, she was also an intelligent communicator who articulated facts and presented her positions in true attorney fashion.

“Women should have the opportunity to express themselves through the clothing that we wear.”

- Cheslie Kryst

5.     Build and nurture relationships.

Expanding beyond relationships with her mom, five siblings and extended family, her role as a mentor, advocate and friend to many showed the importance of relationships in her life. Most importantly, she was a follower of Christ.

“I lean heavily on my faith.”

 - Cheslie Kryst

As we say goodbye to Cheslie, celebrate her life and process the grief of her loss, may she be remembered most prominently for the love, light, joy and impact she contributed during her 30 years on earth.

My thoughts and prayers are with her family, friends, colleagues and all impacted by her death.

In addition to the national suicide hotline 800.273. 8255 (TALK), the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and CDC provide a host of resources for those who need support.

If you’re reading this and need a prayer or listening ear, I’d love to offer either or both. Connect with me here or on any social media platforms @JASMINECTATE.

Hugs & Handshakes,

Jasmine C. Tate